Why Are Trump Supporters Such A Whining Bunch Of Turds?

Donald Trump’s election victory has seemingly turned many of his supporters into fragile little snowflakes who, riding high on clouds of elation over his win, are easily triggered at the slightest hint of criticism against their conservative father figure Trump, who they seem to think is going to lift them from the hole of ‘libtard’ tyranny in which they believe they currently reside and ‘make America great again.’ Whether it’s criticism against Trump’s policies, cabinet appointees, or his endlessly moronic series of Tweets about imaginary voter fraud, flag burning, or whatever else pops into his orange head at 4 a.m., they just can’t seem to bear anything that even comes close to resembling criticism of daddy Donald. This is because in their heart of hearts they believe truly that he is their savior; the one who is here to save them from the commies and make everything better.

Of course, they’re wrong. At absolute best, coming from their perspective, Trump will be a slightly right-of-center neoconservative/neoliberal hybrid whose right-wing-authoritarian rhetorical flourishes are designed merely to placate the traditionalist and nationalist instincts of his conservative base. The man has no real intention to drain ‘the swamp’ in Washington. His only goal is to remove some of the dirty water and replace it with his own polluted brew that he’s been keeping in a metaphorical pool in the basement of Trump Tower. At worst, from that same perspective, he will be little more than a third (and possibly fourth) term of Obama, with a few bones thrown to social conservatives along the way on things like guns, gays, and abortion.

His recent ‘deal’ with the Carrier Corporation is an exercise in the kind of crony capitalism that will most likely be his greatest legacy. The deal ‘saves’ less than half the jobs the company was planning to ship off to Mexico in exchange for millions in tax cuts and favorable access to federal spending contracts for its parent company. In other words, cronyism and corporate welfare in a nice little Trumpian package; making corporate America happy again. In addition to this, Trump’s laughably empty trillion dollar infrastructure plan would make John Maynard Keynes blush, and he is quickly filling up his cabinet with the types of ‘elitists’ who his deluded voters believed he was running against. Anyone who didn’t see this coming from a mile away should have their eyes surgically removed, because they’re not serving a useful purpose at this point and they could probably be taxidermied and pawned for a pretty penny in Vegas. Might as well get something out of it, since the economy is soon going to tank.

But daddy issues are pretty deeply ingrained and the Trumplicans will likely never turn on their political father. He will routinely back away from his promises, fail to deliver results, and will be another in a long line of shit Presidents. But just like their left-wing counterparts who have yet to admit that Obama was a presidential failure, Trump’s supporters will love and adore him til the next ringmaster comes to grab their attention, most likely after the Democrats win back the Presidency for a few years and have their turn to continue the endless cycle of fuckery that we in the United States call politics.

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Rob Cotton

Nomadic scribe. Anarcho-phenomenologist.

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